During our sleep cycle we make a couple of hundred minute little movements. This excludes the incredibly entertaining yet alien and absurd soundtrack that accompanies us in this unconscious state.
In broad, these categories are: the diaphragm flexing glottal groaner, the infamous locked-jaw horse blower, the sudden rapturous yet staccato inhaler, the quick cough burst-er, the sexy sigh-er, the almost incomprehensible chatter who includes at least one recognizable word. Then there's off course the plethora of different snorers. The high, low and middle rangers. The throat, nose and palate resonators and my personal favorite, the choker.
You are very likely to fall within one of these almost ineffable categories as sleeper. You might very well be a combination contender depending on your current diet and amount of alcohol you've consumed.
Duration: 90 seconds
Audience: North America, Europe
The commercial consists of a series of events that take place where the protagonist, Jesse, is caught up in a world where everyone only communicates with variations of these sleeping sounds. The simple reason for this is that Jesse started his day without having drunk a real good cup of strong coffee.
Jesse never really completely woke up and therefore the world around him is pretty much still also asleep. Jesse’s experience, as it is for all of us right before we’ve had our first cup of good stuff, is a likened to still being caught between characters on that smokey bridge between conscious and unconsciousness.
In our commercial all the actors react with expressions and attitudes exactly like they would if they were giving an everyday, verbally recognizable reply, only in Jesse's case it's populated with the strangely weird sounds of one or a combination from the sleeping soundtrack.
Jesse is an average college student. He still lives with his parents because that’s just the way he prefers it. He’s quite sporty but has slacked off a little of late because of his studies and part time job. His morning and afternoon coffee have become quite important ‘pick-me-ups' in his daily routine. On this day, for some or other reason, he incomprehensibly forgot and he’s paying the ultimate price for his error.
Snorry, I forgot
INT. DAY. FAMILY KITCHEN
Jesse walks into the kitchen and his mother smiles at him. He sits down at the table and his mom puts some snacks down in front of him. She wants to say, “remember to pick your sister up from school”, but all that comes out is the sound of someone talking in her sleep.
mmm kllleff schmme my daughter half ghmmmff.
Whaaaat? LIsten I’ve gotta run. I’m picking Lucy up right?
Mom looks around from where she’s standing at the kitchen counter and replies, “Yes, that’s what I just said”, but what Jesse hears as he’s already on his way out are two quick releases of breath followed by a sigh.
Huhhh, huhhh, aaaah.
Right. Read you loud and clear mom.
EXT. DAY. TOWN TRAFFIC LIGHT.
Jesse is driving his car and stops at a traffic light. A sexy girl in a topless Mercedes stops next to him and lifts her sunglasses giving him an sexy glare. Jesse is instantly attracted to her and shuffles around a bit uncomfortably. After fumbling around a bit he manages to come up with a conversation starter. She replies “You should be so lucky” , but what comes out is two puffs of her lips followed by two short snorts.
One day I could tell our children that we met at a traffic light?
Pfffr. Pfffr. Snork Snork.
Jesse is a little confused by her reply, but thinks it not more off kilter than his own shallow one-liner. Just as he’s ready to take the conversation further, the girl speeds off.
I, I didn’t get that. Is that gonna be a problem?
Jesse shakes his head, feeling that he made a blunder of the opportunity. He slowly takes off from the traffic light as well.
EXT. DAY. CONVENIENT STORE PARKING LOT
Jesse stops at a convenient store. He gets out and makes his way to the store entrance. Next to the door is a hobo begging for money. All that Jesse hears is the hobo sing/talking and giving soft giggles. The sound makes his stretched out hand and his desperate eye contact conflicting. Jesse is a bit confused and looks behind him.
Mella mooh galba glur klarn.
No problem old timer. I’ll get you a sandwich.
INT. DAY. CONVENIENT STORE.
Jesse has some items in his hands as he’s waiting in a queue behind a couple who are smitten with each other. The couple turn to each other and start rubbing their noses together. It appears like they’re going through the whole, “No I love you more” banter, but all that Jesse hears is the girl giving a couple of low manly snores with the guy replying with quick cute high pitched snores.
Girl in love
Guy in love
Jesse looks around to see if anybody else is actually hearing this curious public display of affection. The couple pay and leave still clinging to each other. Jesse steps up to the cashier. He looks after the couple as they exit and addresses the clerk. The clerk responds with, “Well it is absolutely none of my business what they do, as long as they pay for their goods”. What Jesse hears is the clerk delivering extremely long deep snoring sounds, separated by unworldly wheezes. Every time he wheezes the air out, it concludes with his lips flaring, making his cheeks bulge.
Kids these days, huh?
Snore. Blow. Pffrt. Snore. Blow. Pffrt. Snore. Blow. Pffrt.
Jesse is again taken aback and he appears to be a little confused. He confronts the clerk but the clerk responds with,”You bet, have a good one”. All Jesse hears is a final long snore ending with a really long blow of horse lips.
You know, you should have those sinuses checked. And work on your people’s skills.
Snore. Blooooowwww. Small fart.
EXT. DAY. CONVENIENT STORE PARKING LOT
Jesse hands the hobo the sandwich without paying much attention. The hobo makes a gurgle sound like a baby. We only notice Jesse’s facial expression to it that contests of having had enough of this weird behaviour.
Jesse is about to get into his car when his old grade school teacher waves and calls out to him from a couple of cars further down the lot. “Jesse, how are you young man?”. All that Jesse hears is a little whistling sound as his teacher blows air out, thereafter sucking air in through her teeth.
Jesse is now very much at the limit of what he can take of these absurdities. He quickly gets into his car and speeds off. His old teacher stands at a bit of a loss and sighs with a final lispy whistle.
EXT. DAY. FRONT OF SCHOOL
Jesse stops at his sister’s school. He sees her among a group of her friends and desperately waves her over from his car. She excuses herself from her friends and runs up to the window of his car. She tells him, “Listen, I’m going home with Aubrey, her mom will take me home later”. What Jesse hears is her first quickly giving two quick snorts, then talking a couple of nonsense words followed by a quick short sudden sexual exhalation that makes Jesse loose his cool completely.
Lucy, Lucy, over here. Hey, come over here!
Snort. Snort. Schme clook fla glumshoe tlak. Uaaaahhhh.
Lucy runs off back to her friends again but Jesse gets out of the car and chases after his sister. He grabs her by the arm and starts questioning her. All the other teenagers around them turn to them, watching and waiting for the drama to unfold.
Lucy, what is going on? Did you plan this? Funny, I get it. I’m having a blast, now please cut it out.
Lucy has a shocked expression, standing there glaring at him. The crowd has been stunned to silence. He’s stands, looking at her in desperation. Lucy suddenly opens her mouth but all that he hears is her softly slapping her tongue, making sounds like she’s tasting the inside of her mouth, grunting softly like she’s asking a question. Jesse is close to tears.
I really need, I really need some sort of…
A voice suddenly comes from out of nowhere. The voice has a godly presence, but is friendly and might very well be his own inner voice. The voice is somewhat judgmental but very willing to give Jesse the answer he’s looking for.
Jesse looks around and reacts perhaps a bit too abruptly at the voice from sheer frustration of not being able to locate the source of the voice.
Yes, what. What is it? What’s up? Tell me.
Did you have a cup of the good stuff this morning?
Jesse still upset but calming a bit now.
No, I did not. I did not have any coffee this morning.
Then snort, because yawn gurgle, you’ll whistle snore grunt fart all lipsmack long. You following me there slugger?
Jesse is suddenly engulfed with rays of enlightenment. Everything suddenly makes sense. The effect of his relief is overpowering and he falls to his knees.
Yes, Yes slugger gets it. I get it now. I…get…it.
It starts to rain coffee beans. Jesse stretches out his arms and opens his mouth.